30 de diciembre de 2007

Una nueva vida


Está harta de levantarse todos los días con el sonido chirriante de un despertador viejo y destartalado que es el único adorno de su velador. Hay que ir a trabajar otra vez en esa oficina desordenada y fría, llena de papeles en el piso y en el escritorio y en la que a nadie le gusta entrar. Estela es joven y se vería hermosa si quisiera, pero la rutina la ha devorado entera y solo quedan restos de la chica que le gustaba demasiado al conserje y al presidente del directorio de la empresa de cosméticos en la que labora. Hastiada, no se baña, no desayuna, no se arregla, tan solo se pone el mismo uniforme plomo que la hace ver más tétrica aun, doblega a un par de mechas rebelde, coge diez soles y sale rauda, tirando la puerta. En casa, sus padres se quedaron con las ganas de decirle buenos días. Como siempre.

En la calle, Estela mira a todos con cara de pocos amigos. Jamás una sonrisa y menos un por favor. Prácticamente le tira las monedas al cobrador del micro y entra empujando a todos en el edificio que siente como una cárcel. Llena de cólera convertida en hostil silencio, se sienta en su maldito escritorio y prende por enésima vez la desgraciada computadora que, para colmo, no tiene Internet. Lo mismo de siempre: pasar mail tras mail pidiendo cotizaciones, requiriendo material para los vendedores, cuadrando cuentas. Todo igual que ayer y el mes pasado. Igual que el año anterior y lo mismo que hace cinco años. Lo único distinto es su rostro. Parece que de golpe cada día envejece un año. Amargada, desolada, insípida. Estela se ha convertido en un mueble más de esa oficina a la que nadie quiere entrar.

Se pasa el día mirando mal a la gente hasta que dan las siete de la noche y se larga, tirando la puerta, fiel a su estilo. Presurosa, no se percata que en la puerta de su cárcel había una niña de ropas raídas y carita sucia, con unos boletos de lotería en una mano y una bolsa de caramelos de a 20 céntimos cada uno en la otra. La vida no tiene sentido, piensa Estela. Para qué trabajar tanto en esa mierda de empresa si nunca asciendo, si no me aumentan el sueldo y con lo que me pagan solo me alcanza para sobrevivir; y, para colmo -sigue pensando-, hay seres como esta niña que no tiene culpa de nada y pagan cuentas de otros.

Masticando su cólera, Estela decide comprarle un caramelo, mejor dos, mejor dos caramelos y un billete de lotería, mejor dos billetes de lotería y un paquete de galletas que venden en el kiosko de al lado. Si me gano el premio, te prometo que te compraré ropa nueva y te daré mucha comida, le dice a la niña sin preguntarle siquiera como se llama. Igual la niña sintió algo de calor en esa noche fría de Lima, sintió candidez en esa mirada horrible de Estela, quien de tanto fruncir el seño ya no puede expresar ternura con su rostro. Los músculos de su cara se han acostumbrado a la dureza.

Estela, con toda su asquerosa rutina espera un par de días y el viernes a las diez en punto de la noche prende su televisor para ver el sorteo de la lotería. No cree en la suerte. Ya no cree en nada, por eso tiene el billete en la mano sujetándolo solo por instinto. Encerrada en su cuarto, más desordenado que su oficina, tirada en su cama, escucha, se resiste a ver la tele, solo mira al techo. A mí no me pueden pasar cosas buenas, se repite en silencio, como si le gustase taladrarse el alma ella misma con un arma punzocortante. Y empiezan a saltar las bolitas que ella no ve. Veinticinco. Sí, va uno, dice incrédula. Dieciocho. ¿Qué raro? Otro más. Van dos. Treintaidós. ¡No puede ser! Grita y pega los ojos en la pantalla. Ocho. Sí, carajo. Vamos, quince, por favor, quince. Primera vez en muchos años que decía por favor y primera vez en muchos años que su rostro no reflejaba amargura. Ahora su cara era la de una mujer con esperanza. Quince. Quince, quince, quince. ¡Mamá! ¡Papá! Me saqué la lotería. Y ríe, ríe, ríe tanto que sus padres se asustan. Primera vez en muchos años que les dirigía la palabra como debe ser. Y primera vez en muchos años que reía.

Dicen que el dinero no hace la felicidad, pero para Estela esa máxima es una verdadera tontería. Ahora es feliz, como nunca antes. Son las diez y quince de la noche. No le importa la hora, se peina y maquilla y se despide, como nunca, de sus padres y sale corriendo de la casa, como nunca, sin tirar la puerta. Va en busca de la niña sin nombre que le había vendido el billete de lotería. Sube a un taxi y pide que por favor la lleven a la empresa donde trabaja. Durante el corto viaje solo ríe y tiene unos deseos incontrolables de abrazar a esa niña. Distingue a lo lejos el edificio de la empresa de cosméticos, pero a medida que se acerca unas luces rojas oscilantes la inquietan. Le paga al taxista y se baja corriendo. Le pide a varios policías que por favor la dejen cruzar la calle para ir al edifcio que ya no le parece una cárcel. Sabía que al pie de la puerta debía estar la niña. Estela no entiende por qué tanto alboroto, por qué hay policías y por qué unas personas vestidas de blanco están paradas frente a la puerta del edificio, todas juntas, tapando con una frazada algo que no llega a distinguir.

Ansiosa, Estela pregunta a uno de los agentes qué sucede y este le cuenta en pocas palabras que una combi asesina se salió de la pista y mató de golpe a una niña que estaba vendiendo billetes de lotería, que la aprisionó contra la puerta del edificio y que varios indolentes se llevaron decenas de billetes de lotería que quedaron desperdigados por la calle tras el impacto. Estela queda pasmada. No tiene lágrimas, pero sí un dolor inmenso. La cólera la invade. La rabia. Otra vez nada tiene sentido. La vida es muerte, piensa. Carajo, por qué, yo la quería hacer feliz, se dice en silencio a sí misma. De pronto, una mujer desconsolada la empuja. Estela ya no tiene nada que preguntar, sabe por instinto que esa mujer es la madre de la niña. La sujeta del brazo y le dice, sin lágrimas, que quería mucho a su hija y que va a correr con todos los gastos del velorio y el entierro, y que, en honor a su niña, le dará una herencia. Rápidamente pide un lapicero y un papel a un policía, escribe su número telefónico y se lo da a la adolorida señora. Estela ha decidido de golpe darle todo el premio a la familia de la niña. La señora recibe el papel y Estela vuelve a casa, triste, muy triste. Al llegar, entra, no saluda y tira la puerta. Sus padres, otra vez, no entienden nada. Ella, quebrada, se encierra en su cuarto y una lágrima, por fin, recorre su rostro.

Durante la noche no puede dormir y el sonido chirriante del viejo despertador le es indiferente. Comienza su rutina de siempre, pero con los ojos hinchados de tanto llorar. Se levanta con desgano y de pronto suena el teléfono. La madre de la niña está al otro lado de la línea. Le cuenta que su hija se llamba Estela y la Estela viva decide, al instante, vivir por la inocente que murió. Quedan para verse y tratar el tema del premio y al colgar el teléfono una sonrisa asoma tímida en la cara de Estela, quien corre a buscar su lapiz de labio. La vida no es muerte, piensa, ya no.

32 comentarios:

Unknown dijo...

muy bonita historia lucho. y este comentario es voluntario y sin coacción, por siaca, jeje. un abrazo.

Anónimo dijo...

Previsible con los plot points puestos donde deben estar provocando los cambios de linea, sin embargo el final es anticipado desde el principio, quizas un final que saque de cuadro para una historia convencional vendria bien. Te recomiendo este blog: http://eldetonadorastral.blogspot.com/

RojasAramburúMagally dijo...

Me gustó mucho la historia, no sé si recibiste unos poemas que te dejé en el Comercio, muchas felicidades y yo recién empiezo un blog como tarea de la PUCP saludos, Magally Rojas Aramburú

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